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Shy, awkward people are sometimes overly guarded and secretive. When everyone is talking about more personal subjects they're good at hanging back and not contributing, changing the topic, taking the attention off them, giving vague, evasive answers, or deciding now's the right time to get up and see what everyone else at the party is doing.


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Most people would like to be more open than they are right now. Being Open with Others Isn't Easy We often hide our inner thoughts and feelings because we're concerned if they'll be accepted by other people. Focus on feelings. When we stay open to learning, new experiences open up for us. Again a reminder of caution about being open and sometimes being too open.

Change your questions into statements you can make about yourself. Keep in mind also that being completely open with everyone in every situation may be very inappropriate.

Reasons people can become overly guarded

You will not bore your audience. Everybody has an opinion.

However, if we work really hard and try to understand the hurt, if we share the hurt and are open about the hurt, we are actually being more open at a deeper level. That takes hard work and a lot of honesty. It would be more honest and open to share resentment openly with the person and that way the situation and your feelings can be changed. You will not share your feelings or thoughts too quickly and thereby push your listener away.

That puts the conversation on a little deeper level. It's usually easier to share opinions or thoughts about something. You may choose not to be open with people you don't fully trust because to be open is to share vulnerable information about yourself. You will not have someone listen to you too long, without giving them hints about the kind of listener you want them to be.

And if you don't fully trust how someone else will use that information about you, you may choose not to share it. That inner person is a complex person who has a variety of thoughts and feelings. Trust will be very important for you also in what you're willing to be open about.

It's good to be able to trust somebody.

High openness means being creative and open to new ideas

Try to change your questions into statements. Telling somebody where you bought that new pair of shoes might be one way of being open. Instead, we ask a question. For instance, we might say "do you love me? Perhaps the same can happen to you. The word "open" is used a lot. Share openly the feelings as much as you can. However, if other people are with you, talking to them about your anger is probably easier for them than ducking from a book you just threw towards them.

There are risks attached to sharing that information. What you share about yourself should encourage others to come in, so to speak, and make contact with you. For instance, sometimes when a person resents someone, they still smile and pretend they're happy. Communicate in the first person. It's harder to share feelings. Being Open is a Two-Way Street Becoming open also means becoming open to what others are saying and sharing about themselves.

Over the years, you've probably heard others say "open up. Be sensitive to their feelings. On the other hand, you have to be prepared for the other person's reaction. Begin sentences with "I" instead of "you". Make your outside behavior the same or congruent with your inside feelings and thoughts.

In relationships

For instance, when you're angry, there's a difference between throwing a book across the room and talking out your feelings. That is letting what shows, your expression, frown, words represent what you actually feel and think. This may mean not disclosing everything with some people out of respect for their feelings. So, wanting to share with other people these inner feelings and these inner thoughts is one way of becoming open.

Another example might be to say that work or your relationship is terrible, it's horrendous. We're denying ourselves that chance to speak out, to declare our inner thoughts and feelings. But we also shut out other people from knowing and accepting us by not being open. We sometimes use our friends and families for this purpose.

Both are certainly ways of being open about anger. However, it might be more meaningful to share why clothes are important to you. By not being open with others, we're really saying we don't fully accept ourselves.

What is an open minded person like?

Sometimes, we have an attitude or feeling about something and we're afraid to share it, we're afraid to be open. But it also is important in terms of really letting others get to understand how we think, how we feel and what we believe. You have the power to change things by being open and sharing things. Trying to talk about yourself in such a way that something of the inner person, that is you, is communicated to others might be one way of being open or at least thinking about being open. We call this being congruent.

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We often hide our inner thoughts and feelings because we're concerned if they'll be accepted by other people. Becoming open also means becoming open to what others are saying and sharing about themselves. Being open also carries a responsibility with it and that is to be aware of others reactions to us and to respect their reactions. By being sensitive to others, you'll avoid making three common errors. We might find it easier to show the anger.

If feels good to talk to somebody about things we're concerned about. Most important is an immediate here-and-now honesty that goes along with being open. What is it about those pair of shoes that is important to you? Also, some people may be very uncomfortable with too much openness and you may not want to be as open with them.

It's up to you to decide just how you're going to talk about yourself and what you're going to say.

Sub traits of the openness domain

Be in touch with how you feel. When you're feeling jealous, happy, anxious or sad why not share with other people what you're really feeling. It's really a nice feeling to get things off our chest, to get them out in the open. Openness is making your outer world as similar to your inner world as possible. Anger may come from hurt. Try to be open to what that person is sharing about their feelings.

Being open is difficult. It's used in many, many ways.

Investigating the "o" in h.o.w. (honest, open and willing)

In the name of being open we say everything we feel or think to others, but fail to be sensitive to others feelings about our openness. We may make them feel very uncomfortable or say something that hurts them. Some feelings cover or come from other feelings. Understand its importance to them and their trusting you with this feeling or thought. We know it feels good to share with others. However, it's more important to share why you're saying that about work or your relationship.

Medically reviewed by Harry Croft, MD. All Rights Reserved. By building mutual trust, you and your listener will share a great deal more. Many of us first heard it when we were very small and someone was hovering over us with a spoonful of strained food in their hand and urging us to open up wider.

What do we really mean by becoming open? So be sensitive to others and try to be open and receptive to what they're sharing with you. To involve themselves with you. An example is someone talking about doing badly on a test. Site last updated April 26, What does it mean to open up to others and how do you accomplish that?

What does it mean to have an open personality?

Here are 5 ways for you to be more open. Finally, the extent to which others are open with you will depend on how open you are with them. Keep in mind that some ways of being open are more appropriate and helpful than others. And when you are open and honest about negative feelings, it also makes you responsible for suggesting alternatives to change those feelings. Many people discover that as a relationship develops, openness is reciprocated and the relationship becomes more meaningful.

The Meaning of "Opening Up" What do we really mean by becoming open? Learning to be a good listener. Being open is a kind of invitation to others. It makes us feel vulnerable, psychologically naked and usually anxious. You may want to be more open with your spouse or close friends, but not with your boss or people you don't know as well.